The city pool opened today. Walker and I took Diva, Bro brought his boys, and we made an afternoon of playing in the water and the hot, hot sun. It was fabulous. We came home feeling tired and refreshed at once. Walker made hot dogs on the grill while I heated up chili sauce and sliced watermelon. The kids ate chili cheese dogs for an early dinner and spent the evening running through the sprinklers. Overnight, it's summer. In the morning all the boys are going fishing. Early, so I'll have the house to myself when I get up.
Which is great, because I could use a break. Walker's been crabby lately, and today before everyone got here he blew up at me over the clutter in the house. I have never been a spotless housekeeper, and honestly, I don't aim to be. The house is vacuumed and dusted weekly. The dishes are done and the trash is taken out every day. I keep the bathrooms cleaned, usually twice a week. I do about six loads of laundry a week, and Bro does the laundry for himself and his boys. To me, that's fine. I know some people vacuum and mop and clean the bathrooms every day. I do not, and I don't intend to start. I have a full plate already. Walker was off work all day yesterday, but he went golfing instead of doing housework. So, it is what it is. I am not the only one living in this house, but most days, I'm the only one cleaning it. I refuse to be bullied into doing more.
That said, I felt pretty much like crap for most of the day. Despite the fact that I stood up for myself, and despite his own admission that he could be doing more to pitch in, Walker tends to say things that he later regrets. Things that cut deep. He's not great at apologizing, not that it helps much when he does. I feel like I work damn hard at the office and at home, and I don't appreciate being told that my efforts are inadequate.
Walker had blown off all his steam before everyone got here, and I reminded myself that he's put up with a lot having another adult and two kids in the house for the last few months. I really wish he'd talk about things before he goes off the deep end like he did, but this is his pattern. He won't have another screaming fit for about six months. He was fine by the time we left for the pool. He played with the kids, making a game out of creating a splash big enough to soak the lifeguards. For a guy who isn't particularly large, he's a champion splash maker. And later, after everyone was off doing their various projects, he did the dishes and vacuumed. A peace offering.
Right now, I need to go to bed. I want to make sure I don't sleep through the whole morning, when I have the entire house to myself.